Secondhand Emotion
by MMWard
Summary: SummerSeth She didn't know it would be up to him... [Chapter 4 Up]
1. Ordinary Endings

Second-hand Emotion    

Chapter 1: Ordinary Endings 

"You make me sick." He hears the staccato pace of her heels as she walks away leaving him in utter embarrassment, as per usual. This scene will be erased from his mind the next time he asks again.

"I'm glad I make you feel something," he announces at her retrieving back. This sentence should be said with sarcasm, but in this circumstance, there is none. 

It is their special routine. Seth approaches Summer, tries to make polite conversation while purposely ignoring her snide comments, and at the end is left standing still very much the lost puppy. 

He isn't sure when this cycle is supposed to end but waits patiently in the in-between. 

*

_The dork needs to get a clue_, she thinks while on her way to the kitchen. In the corner of her eye Summer sees a guy giving her the up and down. She turns to give him a glare but finds that he wouldn't be such a bad distraction… at least for now. So instead she flashes him a smile, challenging him, and he rises to it taking that as enough invitation to start a conversation.

"Hi." He leans into her ear to whisper something that would make Monica Lewinsky blush. 

She on the other hand has heard it before, although not the exact same wording. Summer rolls her eyes but is still slightly interested when she takes another glance at his face.

They travel into the kitchen and he, Devon as she is told, reaches into the cooler taking out two Budweiser's. She ignores the bottle he tries to hand her and walks around the island reaching for the liquor. Devon's grin grows as he spies the object in her hand. They take turns until it is empty and they're both sufficiently wasted enough to admire only each other.  His gaze is moving down her body and in her light headed state she tricks herself into taking it as a compliment. Summer pulls on his wrist leading him to her room as the party rages on around them. As they enter, he quickly traps her in the small space between the door and himself. 

"You're beautiful," he murmurs as he gains access to her mouth with his own. She barely hears his compliment; there is no need to butter her up. Summer deepens the kiss caught up in the moment, but it's just one moment, one night. They would both forget about each other in the morning after he climbs out her window.   

Summer is definitely not a believer in the cliché world of love. There is only lust, and when that ends, then it's time to move onto the next guy. That's something Seth needs to learn, she bitterly thinks as Devon's mouth finds hers again, because there's no way in hell she will one day wake up and believe that he is her whole reason of existence. No f*cking way…

* 

Seth is found standing near the sliding door. Confidence, the voice in his head sounds biting, that's what he lacked. Says Anna who's somewhere in Tahiti. Said his mom when he was little and refused to go uninvited to a birthday party for one of the rich, spoiled brats. He remembers the million of pity glances Ryan sends his way whenever Summer is trying to feel **Ryan** up. Seth isn't sure why all these things slip his mind so easily when he is frequently spending his day thinking about Summer. Memories of Summer and him aren't exactly what dreams are made of.  

 The guy Summer disappeared with a while ago is probably oozing with confidence, Seth thinks resentfully while chugging down a third Budweiser… and then cringing as the taste hits the back of his mouth. He is only looking forward to when the liquid hits his stomach and he gets to the hazy aftermath. The house is blanketed in sound and he is relieved to know the sounds of Kylie Minogue will be enjoyable in a few minutes. However, after a little taste of the same music in his new induced state his opinion about Kylie Minogue still hasn't changed. Seth decides the combination of music and alcohol was more nauseating then a beer alone would ever be and he calls for a ride. Punching his home number he feels deeply indebted to whomever out there when Ryan is the one to pick up.

"Hello?"

"Hey it's Ryan!" His need for calling is forgotten. "Listen man I gotta let you know how much I appreciate the fact that you screwed up so that you could end up here." Seth ambles over to an overpriced couch suddenly feeling unsteady while standing. "You've been great these past few weeks you know? A real pal." 

"You're drunk." Ryan's voice is flat. He's been through this too many f*cking times to count. Though Seth's not supposed to be on the line, his mom is, telling him how much she loves him and how they're going to pull their lives together one day… 

Seth's voice jars him out of unwanted thoughts. "I… am." He suddenly feels the need to get home. "That's why I was hoping you'd be a pal and come get me."

Ryan gives a disgusted sigh and says, "Yeah, I'm on my way." He stretches while trying to decide between taking Sandy's car or Kristen's.  

"Thanks, I owe you." He hears a click and the screen shows that Ryan's already hung up. Viciously shaking his head he heads toward the front door. Fresh air hits him on his way out and he welcomes its appearance while he waits. Even in his current state his mind forms a last coherent thought, _the cycle had to eventually end sometime. _

*

Summer wakes the next morning to the sound of rustling. She uses her elbows to support her weight while she peers over the side of her bed. She sees a half-dressed guy searching for his shirt near her bed. She delicately points its location and he reaches over to retrieve it. He pulls it on, plants a kiss on top of her head, and walks out her door in a matter of minutes.  

_Guess the window's saved for bad teen movies._

Sighing she flops back into bed and feels the urge for a shower. Summer runs her hands idly through her hair contemplating today's plans. Lazily strolling out of her room she decides to call Coop after her hour-long shower. 

It was just another morning to end an ordinary night.

*

_Birds chirping, they need to die_. 

Seth groans as the morning migraine settles in his brain. He is starting to re-think the need of alcohol, at least for a week. He stumbles out of bed, falling in the process. He blindly feels for the doorknob to lead him to the bathroom where aspirin would be found. Seth's hand finally encircles the knob and he twists it thanking his stroke of luck. 

"Whoa!" He blinks several times attempting to control his brain. Ryan is standing there holding a glass of water and the aspirin bottle. "Good timing."

Ryan casually lifts his right shoulder and answers, "I heard a thump from your room when I was in the bathroom. Sounded familiar."

Seth finishes gulping down his water. "I wanted to thank you again. My mom would pretty much have obliterated me if she saw me last night."

Ryan shrugs his shoulder again. "No problem, just don't expect me on duty every night."

He shakes his head reassuringly. "Not needed for a while." Seth's face brightens and then cringes. "So, what are you up for today," he asks his voice strained.

Ryan finally shows a semblance of a smile. "I'm thinking you need a few more hours of rest."

"Nah, I'd probably end up staying in the whole day." Seth starts to walk past Ryan and says over his shoulder, "Quick shower and we'll go past the pier or something for breakfast." 

"Its lunchtime," Ryan calls out heading downstairs.

Seth's vision is blurred as the steam hits the bathroom mirror. He isn't such a pretty sight in the morning anyway. Seth yawns stepping into the steaming shower. 

It was an ordinary morning to end another night.


	2. Unsanitary Measures

Second-hand Emotion    

Chapter 1: Unsanitary Measures

**Disclaimer**: Yes I forgot this on my first chapter but didn't feel like going back and adding it. Obviously I don't own the show or any characters in it. 

**Song Featured**:

Too far Gone – The All-American Rejects

_Now we're too far gone,  
Hope is such a waste  
Every breath you take you give  
me the burdens bitter taste___

It's been a week, and Seth's locked himself in his room. He's trying something new where the ending does not include him melting at Summer's feet. So he's held himself captive. _It stifles the urges_. Really, what does he have to complain about? He's no longer friendless, he's never broken any major body part, he's healthy, in decent shape. Seth's had money all his life; he's not on the streets begging for change. And yet, none of it seems enough… until he makes it. 

One day Summer will be a passing memory. A high school crush, something he will be able to smile upon memory, while he's sailing the world. 

He thinks these thoughts over and over again, trying to make them fit into his existence _now._ Seth's trying to block out Summer's quips, always at the expense of him. They dig through his skin burrowing themselves inside of him until they become a piece of him. 

His resolution still stands from last week. Faded at the edges but it gives him _confidence. He __won't be her knight and shining armor if she doesn't want him there. And she's obviously made it clear that she does not. _

The confidence feels foreign to him, obviously it would. He isn't sure how it came in the first place, but doesn't feel compelled to figure it out. He's worried it might suddenly go away. And now he's worried about his sanity since he's just given personification to emotions.   

Leaning against his headboard, the remote finally drops from his hand. Seth's been holed up for too long he decides after he settling for the opening hour of the Golden Girls marathon. He has a soft spot for Rose Nylund; although it's not something he wants known.

He clicks the television off anxious (mostly from the cause of boredom) to try his new found assurance. Trying to flag down Ryan is another story. Seth decides Ryan's probably off trying out his new tentative-whatever-they-call-it relationship with Marissa. It's basically the one where both of them deny their feelings until they screw themselves over. Or each other… it's either one.     

Realization hits him when he sees that it's one o'clock in the afternoon. _Ryan's at work_. He shoves off the bed and rummages through his haphazard closet. After a few minutes of frantic digging, his right hand finally grips the edge of his skateboard and cups his mouth as he yawns. Standing up, Seth decides to skate down to the pier wanting fresh air after a week of stale air conditioning. 

*

All week long Summer's been out. Out of her house, out of Marissa's house- where she spends more time than her own, and out of her usual party scene. Wanting new excitement, she's explored other clubs, other people. Marissa's been AWOL, probably periodically sneaking out to visit Ryan. Summer sometimes wishes she could let herself go through frail emotions like Marissa. Having something to believe in- even when doubt clouds the perception- feeling safe, loved even. But then she remembers the pain involved and vows to stay emotionless. 

She's now in the bathroom staring at her reflection while applying eye shadow. Next comes the mascara; as she brushes it on, she's narrowing her choices for lunch. Summer's in a rare mood, feeling the need to be alone so she doesn't bother leaving a message on Marissa's voice mail.

She finally tosses the mascara wand aside and efficiently strides to the front door, throwing misplaced items into her purse as she passes them.

*

Her feet take her to a little restaurant on the side of the boardwalk. She quickly steps in, scanning the menu as she waits in line. After placing her order, Summer turns around to take in the place, looking for a seat, preferably one by a window. 

Finally settling into an empty booth, she finds the occupant of the one in front of her is none other then Seth Cohen. _His back is to her, a benefit_; she thinks idly hearing her number called and anticipates him turning around with some lame line. Her hand_ flips through an old Cosmo as she eats. Finishing her meal twenty minutes later, she realizes he hasn't even snuck glances nonetheless come up to talk to her. _He's seriously taking his time. __

She quickly shakes her head, both physically and mentally, ridding herself of thoughts. She decides to leave, obviously, since she's finished her meal. Walking by, Summer feels composed, or at least pretends to be. Hearing no sudden movements behind her she stands in shock. Her hand rests on the door a moment too long to pass as a quick exit.  

Muttering obscenities all the way she detours on her way out back to Seth's booth.

"Are you blind?" She's sounding almost agitated. 

Seth finally raises his head, taking her in, silently. "Well, the fact that I'm staring at you, _Summer_, and know who you are, I take it my sight's pretty well intact."

Summer stands, perplexed. "Well, I mean, I passed you and you didn't even stammer out a hello. That means that you must be blind or in a grave condition."  

Seth snorts, his mouth curving into a half-smile. "Excuse me, o great one. I'm sorry I didn't have the chance to worship the ground you walk on." His response comes out biting but the look on his face contradicts the tone.

Summer feels the heat rising from her lower body, a feeling she's long forgotten ever since that fateful day she had to read her poem in front of the class. "Well I was just saying," she snaps. "It's just… different." Various fragments of her give way as the dawning realization makes its way in. He doesn't like her anymore; he would no longer follow her around, pleading for attention.

She's never let on about her feelings about his infatuation with her, dismissing it as she had any other petty admirer. Though Seth Cohen is was definitely a contrast from her other admirers. She somehow knew he wasn't the type of guy to forget she ever existed the next night. She also has a feeling it would take monstrous drawbacks to sway his attention… and she finally crossed that line. Summer bends down whispering, "Follow me."

*

She leads the way to the women's bathroom, knowing it would shake him. Luckily the lavatory is surprisingly empty. Seth stands, feet apart, hands stuffed in his front pockets as he waits for her to turn around. Summer takes her time, slowly turning the lock sideways until she hears the click.  

Summer runs her fingers slowly down his arm, trying for a reaction.

His eyes merely grow wide, but without flinching, he enfolds his hand over hers and gently removes it from his arm.

Her eyebrows rise in half disbelief, half amusement. _He finally grows a backbone, at least part of one. She lets a thin smile flit through her lips. "I'm impressed."_

His eyes open in mock disbelief. "Imagine my surprise when I realize I don't care."

Seth's shaking inside, but hiding it well. He's trying not to think, therefore he won't feel. He won't feel her fingertips slowly sliding down the path of his arm. He's not aware that her eyes are staring straight at him with no signs of her retreating and leaving him stranded in the middle of the room.

If he had been allowed to be something other than numb… these facts would kill him. 

"Well," she starts out smiling brightly, "aren't we just a tad bit cocky?"

Seth's beginning to falter. There's only so much time you can spend with Summer before wanting to … kiss her. And he's definitely feeling the effects. However, he quickly masks his concern and retorts, "You should know, you've possessed it all your life," while trying to find a way out without actually having to barrel through her. 

Summer's feeling a little more than frustrated. Doubt is starting to weave itself into her convictions and she's still standing here, growing a little more insecure. It's been more than five minutes in this f*cking conversation with him and she hasn't had the chance to turn him down _once_.

Surprisingly, she stops him from leaving, resting her palms on his chest. "Nuh-uh-uh," she breathes her voice soft, a tone he's never heard from her. 

She slowly wraps each arm around his shoulders, letting them loosely intertwine behind his back. Summer closes the distance between them taking even steps until her body is pressed against his. She can hear the short intake of his breaths when she starts to run her fingers through his disobedient, short curls. 

Their eyes meet, his eyes are flickering with doubt whereas hers are starting to regain the dauntless look she's always possessed around him, at least before today. 

Seth leans in, falling into her it seems. There is no rejection this time. Her eyes close when she feels his mouth on hers and she is trapped, unable to resist. The awful elevator music present in the bathroom fades in and out, neither one of them seems to be complaining. Their hands grip tightly onto each other's as he pushes her back against the bathroom door. 

Her usual disgust with public places is displaced at the back of her mind when she feels his tongue seeking contact with her own. Summer's mouth automatically opens but this time, not to a stranger… 


	3. Illicit Parking Maneuvers

Second-hand Emotion    

Chapter 3: Illicit Parking Maneuvers 

**Disclaimer**: Obviously I don't own the show or any of the characters in it. 

**A/N**: I just wanted to thank everyone who reviewed. I really appreciate and it totally made my day. This chapter just wouldn't come out and so, sorry for the delay. I've actually written parts of future chapters before this one which I found ironic. And now I'm just babbling. Anyway, thanks again for the reviews and on with the story…

**Song Featured**:

Space – Something Corporate

Seconds linger… or maybe time had unexpectedly lapsed into minutes. The two bodies melded into one another standing in the bathroom took no notice of the monotonous intervals.  They are in a haze, both barely having room to breath, feeling trapped to each other, and yet at the same time ironically comfortable.  

Summer finally pulls back, hands dropping to her sides, her mouth no longer holding Seth's warmth. They both inhale heavily, taking in the air they had been without those last few moments. Instants pass with an enigmatic silence hovering above them. Seth nervously raises his eyes to meet hers, bracing himself for the inevitable look of disgust looming on Summer's face.  He instead finds her biting her lower lip, shooting glances around the bathroom her eyes never resting on one sight for too long.

She feels his gaze searching her, and throws out a caustic, "What are you looking at?" 

He chuckles, melting the tension. "I'm not answering that."

Her head flinches back, face set in a bewildered frown. "It's just a question."

With confidence he shakes his head. "It's not_ just_ a question. No matter how good the guy's answer is, the girl will twist it up in some morbid fashion until **he** ends up feeling like a loser."

Summer doesn't even open her mouth to protest. Who could against a proven fact? 

The inadmissible questions start to invade her mind and she once again pulls him to her abruptly ending her flow of thoughts. 

He vehemently responds, no moment's hesitation. Being rational and trying to pull his mind back from the depths surrounding Summer is a lost cause. He's too weary to process anything but his awe over the fact that he's standing this close to Summer feeling something other than pain- emotionally or physically (getting slapped is **always** a possibility with Summer). 

Her mind slips, the accusations in her head are ringing louder and she presses her mouth even harder against his. A frustrated groan escapes his mouth as he finally regains enough consciousness to pull back. Seth isn't sure what to expect this time, but can't help risking a peek. 

Summer's face is flushed, triumphant. Her senses have finally clicked and she's finally proud. With her voice even she throws out a truth of her own, "You're_ far from forgetting me." Before the door swings shut on her way out, he hears, "But **nice try."**_

Seth is left to wonder about the torrid turn of events in muted silence. His fingers subconsciously make their way across his bottom lip, his brain still heaving itself out of the reaches of Summer's kisses. He realizes forgetting is not an option when a middle-aged woman clunks his head with the door and it is a mere annoyance instead of a hindrance. 

He stutters (verbal skills after shocking events just aren't his thing) as she quickly whips her head back to the sign to check if it is in fact the ladies room. When the lady finally picks up that he's in the wrong lavatory she proceeds to glare until he shakily stumbles past her. 

The slamming door behind him barely registers as he makes his way out, jingling the bell above the entrance in the process.  

*

 Ryan almost falls off the bar stool, though he does succeed in spraying orange juice everywhere. "She kissed you? Not the other way around?"

Seth finds no humor in the situation. Dryly he replies, "Well, I had to hold a gun to her head but yes, she did."

"Reeally…" He stretches out the syllables causing Seth to doubt whether or not it was sarcasm. 

"NO!" Seth isn't sure of what Ryan really means but wants to make it clear that it was fully Summer's choice. "She did it. She practically mauled me." He feels no pang of guilt for the tiny exaggeration. 

Ryan throws his hands up to defend himself from Seth's overzealous hand motions. "Sorry, I was just kidding. Chill out, I believe you, not the whole mauling thing, but something to that effect."

Ryan leans back into his chair, causing it to balance on its two back legs. "Just don't get your hopes up Seth. You don't need to be screwed over again."

Seth animatedly nods, wanting to hurry along this conversation. "No hopes, check." He's still remembering the kiss, kisses, to be exact. He has cause for concerns but sixteen years of innocence takes its tow and he's got expectations. She had to feel something, right?

Changing the subject and the spotlight, he aims a perplexing question to Ryan, "And things with you and Marissa? Has it taken a beautiful turn like a certain story of mine?"

Ryan rolls his eyes at the senseless latter question. The first one, only an explanation the size of a novel would suffice. However, Ryan being the monosyllabic guy he is can sum it up in a sentence, maybe two. "Same old thing, we're just friends."

It is now Seth's turn to roll his eyes. "You're about as delusional right now as I am giddy." As an after thought he adds, "And that's saying plenty."

The chair scratches across the marble floor as Ryan suddenly plunges forward resting his elbows on the counter. "We're pathetic. Sitting here, griping, you could at least be pummeling me at some game, or me just pummeling you without the game."

"Oh so now you have resorted to physical violence?" Seth 'tsks' using his tongue. "I must be really good to drive you to finding other forms of entertainment." 

Ryan just stares, no particular emotion set in his face.

Moments pass before Seth gets impatient and waves his hand in front of Ryan's face. "Hello?" Ryan finally comes to and looks around trying to identify his current surrounding. His thoughts as usual, had drifted off next door. Seth looks confused for a whole second before realizing the same thing. They really were getting soft. "That's it." Seth gets off the barstool heading into the living room. "Hurry up, this whole sitting-in-the-quiet-while-brooding was never my thing." 

*

Seth parks in the Office Max parking lot, sighing as he closes the car door. _School sucks. This coming year would be no exception. He listlessly grabs a shopping cart as he enters the store. Pushing with his elbows, he's hunched over the cart wearily looking around at the cleanliness and order that school/office supplies hold. He carelessly throws a box of black BIC pens over the ten packs of paper and that's when he notices Marissa in the aisle ahead of him. She's studying two types of graph paper with an expression of contemplation he could never pull off with school supplies. _

The wheels of his cart unexpectedly squeak from time to time as if to try and surprise him with every next step. Marissa distractedly looks up to see the diversion and smiles when she discovers that it's just Seth. "Hey, long time no see." 

She peers around him, eyes confused; no doubt looking for a second person. Seth sees that her eyes have wandered over his shoulder and says, "He's not here. Sorry to disappoint." 

She quickly shakes her head, "No, no disappoint, you guys just always seem to be together that's all." Her eyes tell a contradicting story. 

He skeptically answers, "Yeah, that's the reason." 

Marissa narrows her eyes. "Summer's in the binders' section since you're interested." Notice there isn't an 'if' in the sentence.

Seth smiles, knowing she is surely seething. It isn't his intent, it just happens to work out that way. He walks by, "By the way, I'm going to need a ride to the Star Wars convention this Saturday." He turns back to see her incredulous expression before she starts to smile.  

*

Summer's in front of the section of binders trying to figure out the precise size and color she wants to settle for. There's something about knowing that you're going to be stuck with a decision for a whole year… even if it is just a minor one, in this case, the binders. 

Seth leaves behind his shopping cart and quietly sneaks behind her, waiting to be acknowledged. She, however, is oblivious, still in the process of decision. "Wow," he starts, "I didn't know Summer Roberts cared so much about school." 

Summer's startled when she hears his voice but it never shows. "Wow," sarcastically mocking him. 

 He has no reply and only stands as she takes a couple more binders off the shelves.

"Well," he tries to continue the conversation along, as per usual. "This is… awkward."

"What are you talking about? This feels normal." Summer decides to just buy different colors of each binder instead of settling for the same color. Everyone needs variety… plus it makes the whole walking away thing much quicker. She starts to push the shopping cart down the aisle but almost immediately has to stop when Seth steps in front, hands on its edge. Rolling her eyes, she says "What is this, an intervention?" 

"You never change do you?" Seth doesn't sound the least bit fazed. He dismissively shrugs. "You can be as hostile as you want. It doesn't matter; you can't change the fact that you **kissed** **me." His voice gains volume as he reaches the last few words.**

She violently lets go, the cart almost colliding into Seth's stomach if his hands hadn't been holding onto it. "Are you insane," she hisses.

He shrugs again, "I don't know, my mind's been pretty foggy ever since **you--"**

She quickly reaches his side and pulling on his arm, drags him outside before he gets a chance to finish.

*

Several heads turn as they make their way out, with Summer leading. Curious pedestrians can see two figures almost sprinting, outlined in the bask of the sun.

Summer looks around to see complete strangers staring. Her anger overrules the stage fright she's always held with her and she shouts, "Can't you see we're talking here? Does it look like it concerns all of you?"

Seth cups his hand over her mouth, and smiles bashfully. "Sorry, she's grouchy when she forgets to eat. Come along honey, that's a good girl." He walks backward to his dad's car, hand still attached to Summer. 

Removing his hand, he opens the passenger side for her. "I think you're less likely to make a scene in here, but I'm never too sure."    

Summer waits until he's entered his side and snaps, "You didn't seem to mind making a scene in the store."

He turns the key halfway and fiddles with the knob trying to find the few decent stations left on the radio. "It bugged you," he turns to face her, amused. "I thought it was a good enough reason." 

"You--" She stops, and… smiles. "Cohen, you're such a dork."

He bows graciously, "I aim to please." 

Her lips parts, almost allowing a chuckle to be heard; Summer suppresses it in time, and proceeds to divert her eyes to his dashboard not wanting to give him more attention than necessary. 

"Yes," he's pleasantly surprised to hear this song:  

_Home, is this a quiet place where you should be alone?  
Is this where the tortured and the troubled find their own?_

She groans, "This must be what hell is like."

He mouths along, ignoring her. "_Hey! Give me space so I can breathe_. _Give me space so I can sleep._" Seth lowers the volume a bit and turns to her profile. He's astonished at his nerve and plunges ahead, "So, what now? Food, to mend your grouchiness?" He starts to turn the key but her touch reaches out to stop him. 

"Seth, wait," her voice is an even balance between impatience and casualty. He wonders how she pulls that off. 

Summer continues interrupting his brain, "I'm not, we're not--" She stops, frustrated at her lack of usual eloquence. The quiet is used to her advantage; she takes the time to think before trying to spew out another explanation. 

Seth reads through her pathetic confession and he sits, trying to sort his feelings. His right hand is still grasping the key and he lets go, wiping his palm on the front of his jeans, leaving the denim darker than before. He shouldn't be as dumbfounded as he is; this is, after all, expected.

 Summer is staring at her hands, wringing them in her lap. "The kiss was fun," she mentally corrects herself, 'kisses' but doesn't bother to announce the correction. Summer is sure Seth's thinking of the same thing. "But, that's it. It was just for fun." _Wow, that time was well spent for those three concise sentences, she can tell. "We're friends, tentatively, but still, in the whole quasi friends' realm," she rushes the mumbled sentence before the impending silence can come. _

Her words are mere details, barely heard by him. Seth's spent much of these past two days feeling numb, throw in the occasional splurge of happiness. 

_No hopes…** check**_. 

He swallows forcing the lump back into his stomach where it joins the others. "Yeah, friends." Clearing his throat, he dutifully shakes her hand. 

Her mouth forms into a delicate smile and he tries to imitate, adequately succeeding. "Okay, good, we're settled. Well-" she points back to Office Max, "I'm going to head back."

He curtly nods, fingers drumming upon the steering wheel. The door in keeping with the mood, quietly settles into place as she gets out. 

A twinge of guilt steadily fractures her surface as she reaches his side of the car. Looking through the driver's window, Seth's view is straight ahead, unaware of Summer's staring. 

Her fingernails lightly tap the reflective surface; apathetic, he turns in her direction, mouth in a straight line. The window rolls down and he subtly winces, the sun directed in his eyes. 

Summer leans into the window cupping both sides of Seth's face in her hands, catching Seth off guard. The kiss is impulsive and brief. He doesn't have time to respond before she's gone. "Thanks Cohen, you're not such a bad guy." 

He finally snaps out of his stupor. Despite himself, he grins and calls out to her diminishing outline, "We've just had a breakthrough. You've finally figured out what I've always known." 

The silence greets him hiding the clandestine smile on Summer's face.

**_Give me space so you can drown in this with me_**


	4. Color Me Surprised

Second-hand Emotion    

Chapter 4: Color Me Surprised 

**Disclaimer**: Obviously I don't own the show or any of the characters in it. 

**A/N**: So, it's been awhile. Writing a happy chapter isn't the best thing to do when you're in the opposite frame of mind. For **Predictably Naïve**, the story started out with only two chapters planned but I'm thinking of having it as a backup for whenever I need a change. Anyway, I was pretty much on a high from seeing that certain people reviewed and actually read my story. But I'm basically positive that this chapter's going to suck and hoping that the next one will be decent.   

**Song Featured**:

Hands Down – Dashboard Confessionals

French OPT's, English papers, sleepless nights… _school is in session. Taking his time, Seth hears his own footsteps down the corridor as he makes his way out of the school building after an afternoon lab. He's left with his skateboard as he has told Ryan to take the car since "of course he'll just get a ride from someone else" giving the notion that he did in fact have other options. Marissa had a car. Why wasn't Seth smart enough to realize that Ryan would be with her anyway? _

He's finally reached _freedom_ (mildly put) when he hears a very familiar "Sh-t!" Poking his head through the nearest doorway, Seth sees Summer avoiding the spreading puddle of spilled paint. "Nice bunny hop you've got going there." Seth raises an eyebrow, seeing her obscene gesture. "And lovely finger Summer. You're just brimming with encouragement." 

"Shove it Cohen; there's no way I'm ruining these shoes." She once again bounces over the paint. 

Seth doesn't even try to stop the spreading grin. "Then just stop spilling things."

She snorts, bending down to cover the spot with old newspapers. "I'm not the one who smelled like spoiled dairy for tripping over his shoelaces."  

He sighs and enters their English class walking over to help. "If everyone could just forget that one incid- Hey! You tripped me that day!"

Summer pauses, the memory finally registered. "Oh yeah, fine, I'll just have to remember anothe-"

"No," Seth shakes his head purposely. "I think one is enough for today." They quietly take turns going to the bathroom for wet towels when Seth baits, "You remembered an incident involving me. That's got to tell you something."

"It tells me that I'm nowhere near Alzheimer's. So if you would like to be thanked for that..."

"It means that you have retained a section just for me."

Her face is hidden behind a curtain of hair, eternally growing annoyed at the reminder that he matters. "Lucky you, you've been remembered as a klutzy **loser. I'll alert the paparazzi." She immediately bites her bottom lip, _too harsh_. **

His hand stops; the insult wouldn't have stung, if she hadn't held such a tone of conviction.  They quickly retreat into the silence and Seth stands once the spilled paint is barely visible. Without a trace of emotion, "Well, this was fun. We should do it again sometime. Oh, that's right; I'm due for another session tomorrow." He starts to backing out of the room. "Until the-" 

"I'm sorry," Summer's voice is quiet, composed. "It wasn't supposed to come out like that." 

He has to lean forward to hear her, but becomes instantly pleased. "Just so you know, apologies are supposed to be _heard_."

"I don't have much to apologize for." 

"How you say that with a straight face, I will never know." Seth grins as Summer sticks out her tongue. "Very mature."

Summer rolls her eyes. "Pick up a brush Cohen," She sits back down delicately dipping her own brush into the plastic bowl, coming up with yellow. "I could've been done by now." 

He comes in view with the sign and sees part of the first letter, 'N' painted. "Yeah, because you are so far along." Seth drops down beside her, and follows her command. He fills in the following letter. "Why are _we doing this again?"_

"Honors society; I'm missing hours." 

"You see, other people would baby-sit, pick up trash, feed the homeless…" He trails off, knowing there would be a rebuttal.

"So I'm not great with children, sue me." She starts to doodle, slightly veering out of the lines.

"Really, well children seem to adore me."

"How un-ironic since you _act_ like you're seven."

"Well, y- well," Seth stutters for a bit. "Fine, but I'm rubber and you're glue, whatever you say bounces off me and sticks to you."

"Thanks for proving my point." Her head is bent, concentrating on the letter.

They work completely at ease, and not one insult is heard… only because no one is talking, not wanting to interrupt the silent manner.   

Seth takes a halfhearted swipe already bored with the painting. His brush runs into Summer's hand and whining, she says, "That was on purpose!" She retaliates, painting a yellow strip down the right side of Seth's face. 

Seth's mouth drops in amazement, "Oh no, you didn't just d-" He stops as Summer pokes his face again, now going for the forehead. 

She giggles when he turns, revealing her work. "You've never looked better."

"I'm nothing compared to how you're going to shine." He sticks out his brush, dripping with black paint.

She starts to shake her head. "You wouldn't dare." 

"Fine," Seth lowers his paintbrush and relief fills her body… for a total of three seconds. 

"That's it, it's on now." Summer stands up, grabbing the whole bottle of yellow paint. He quickly does the same and steps back, expanding the space between them.

Summer closes her eyes as she squirts, keeping black paint from entering her eyes. The occasional scream or squeal is heard as the two run around the room, emptying the contents in their choice weapons on each other. A few minutes later, they are both panting, Seth sprained on the floor. Wheezing out a "Truce!" he tosses his vacant bottle into the air. Quietly, he hears the tapping of Summer's precious shoes as she suddenly appears, standing above him. His eyes widen when she willingly tips the yellow paint out, splattering him in the process. Her smile widens and a "Truce" is heard as the bottle clangs to the floor.  

"Ahh!" Abruptly, Summer is partly on him and the floor after he grabs her waist. "You are dead… as soon as I can get up." Neither of them tries for the time being and they lie there, hearing only each other's breathing. 

Seth's hands are still on Summer's waist and she slowly twists around to face him, not wanting for him to let go. He seems to understand and only stares as she settles into place. Seth's throat is suddenly dry, anticipation giving him the urge to lean in a little closer. And he gives in, as he always does.  

Feeling him coming closer, she closes her eyes, lips parted…

And then he's gone, hands dropped from her waist, clearing his throat, covering the awkwardness. She lowers her eyes, collecting herself, reassuring herself that she's okay, happy. Happy for reasons she won't admit to anyone else. Summer won't end up the one hurting him… it _might_ just be the other way around. Her vision to the ground, she sees her dress, **shoes, outlined in black.**

Sitting up, amazed with his restraint Seth sees Summer's shoulders shaking. "Hey," he gently rubs her back. "Paint's bound to come out." 

Trying to hide convulsed laughter, she finally looks up, and loses it again. "I look like the crypt keeper!" Her frank laughter is astounding and Seth once again takes up the habit of staring. 

"Well if it's any consolation, you're the cutest crypt keeper I've seen." Or anything else for that matter.

Between peals of various outbursts, "You really warm the heart Seth." 

He points out, "You're still laughing, must have done something." Now forcing herself to frown, she can't keep it up, making the mistake of glancing over. Seth is literally _plastered_ with the yellow and reminds her of something instep with Easter and eggs. 

"Let's just get back to work…" The work currently spoken of is by no means better off than the two of them. Groaning she scrambles to the teacher's desk, coming up triumphant while holding a pair of scissors. "We have to cut out the letters and paste them onto another sheet."

Laziness has kicked in again and Seth searches for a quick exit equipped with a lame excuse. "Well, look at the time… it's almost… **four," he finishes, deadpanned. **

"Sit, Cohen." Direct command, how could he resist?

And he can't. Seth noisily sits beside her before picking up the second pair of scissors. 

*

He reaches over, rubbing the wet brush over a particularly dark spot on her arm. 

Violently she pulls away, unintentionally smearing the paint, piling on a second layer. "What are you doing now?"

"There's a missing spot that I thought I should paint over. And you are paint." He fights the ever present smile, forcing a straight face. Briskly nodding she's already jabbed a dry paintbrush at his arm before he can flinch out of the way. "Hey, you didn't even get any paint!"

Pretending to thoroughly inspect the tip, she offers a suggestion. "You're right. I think I should try again." 

This time Seth dodges her outstretched arm while mirroring her movement and tries for the face.

Ironically- for her- laughter echoes through the room, gaining volume as the two advance in their revenge. Everything seems too good. Nothing exists but half hearted swipes and the dizzying sensation of simple happiness, drenched in an empty English class. The attempts to make the other swallow paint become more lethargic as time passes but the blissful mood remains, wishing to linger.

*

"Finally! We're done." She presses her finger over the last letter on the paper, smoothing it down enough to stick. 

"Gee, it only took-" Seth pauses to peer at his watch, "three hours." 

"At least we're done." Summer lays the banner on several desks, setting to dry. Picking up her purse, she says "Thanks Seth," and saunters out of the room.

Hurriedly, he shoves his bag over his shoulder and runs to catch up to her. "Aren't we supposed to clean something? Like the entire room?"

She bypasses his statement, never one to enjoy cleaning. "He'll deal with it."

 Unsurprising, Seth moves on. "Okay, so how about a ride?"

"I think the skateboard under your arm is meant for something." Digging for her keys now, waiting for an idiotic response.  

"But a car is much faster in the speed department." Laying his hand on her arm, Summer finally turns to face him. "We're** friends** right?" He emphasizes on the word friends, causing it to mean all the things he wishes they were instead.

_So now she's a taxi cab. _"Fine," Summer answers realizing she isn't one to enjoy being in another's favor. There's no sign of her knowing his silent innuendos. 

"Really…" Suspicion leads Seth to trances of Summer, waiting for the precise moment- when he's halfway in the car- to drive off. 

"Did I stutter?" He's pushed through the school entrance, letting her pass by first. 

"I think you're supposed to actually _stutter_ while saying that." He's amused; she's the first person to screw an insult whilst 'causing the other person to doubt instead of the other way around.

"Does it matter?" What Summer says… goes. "You need a ride or not," she asks, reaching her car.   

 Already standing expectedly by the passenger door, Seth's waiting for the lock to pop. "I promise if I find one tiny, iridescent spot of paint on my interior, I'll…" Her eyes dart to the skateboard. "I'll paint your skateboard…" She pauses for the full effect, "pink."

"Am I not enough of an outcast already?" Displaying a tinge of pseudo disappointment, his mouth is shocked. "You want me killed don't you?"

She shrugs, "Death is inevitable." 

"Doesn't mean you have to try and hurry it along." The door's now open and he hesitantly steps in, opting to place a book on the seat than to sit on it directly. He's quite afraid; sure that Summer could follow through with certain promises. 

She laughs when getting in, seeing Seth cramped, head poking at the windshield. Her amusement doesn't go unnoticed as he turns to scorn her, causing her to almost fall out of her chair. "Your glare could use some work."

"That's just 'cause I'm so lovable," he automatically replies, grimacing while reaching up to rub the back of his neck.

Her face softens slightly, "I wasn't serious… well I was, but you don't need to go to extremes." 

Seth shakes his head, a motion that doesn't veer far to the right for fear of the door. "This is extremely comfortable."

Rolling her eyes she leans over to pull the book from under him and he grunts as his butt hits the seat. "Fine, but it can't be my fault anymore."

"Oh it still is, that doesn't change."

"Hand me back the book then." He raises his eyebrows expectedly, palm out, waiting to sink under the book's weight.

Starting the car, Summer tosses the book behind her, letting it hit the backseat before it promptly falls to the floor. "Go get it." 

He turns out of his seat, keeping up with the charade, "Love to." 

Finally backing down, Summer presses her hand against his shoulder, commanding, "Just sit back." 

Making himself comfortable, he stretches his legs as far as they can go and places his hands behind his head. "Well alrighty then."

"I highly doubt that position's comfortable."

"It isn't. It just makes a point." He sits up again, gripping the window's edge as Summer "drives" out of the parking lot. "Are you trying to fly?"

"What? Is that a complaint I hear?" Whipping her head to look at him she points to the door. "There's your exit." 

Seth's arms instantly rise above his head, surrendering. "Just put your hand on the wheel." Closing his eyes, his face crumples and Summer hears, "Please, not yet, not yet, please, I'm not ready to die."

 Ignoring his pleas to be saved, she speeds around another corner. 

*

"Thanks for the two-handed driving," Seth says resulting in his textbook hurled at him. Quickly sticking his head back in he continues, "And so friendly too."

"Move your head before I_ fly,_ Cohen." One last grin and he steps back heading into his house. 

Her eyes stay on his diminishing figure before the focus suddenly comes back and she blinks, the thoughts fading, her mind firmly facing reality. Hand on the steering wheel; she sees a rather appalling glob of paint near the bottom of the passenger seat. Leaning over for a closer look, she finds a _Dashboard Confessional's- apparently- c.d. lies next to it. _

Seth quickly backtracks to the door, his c.d. nowhere to be found. About to step outside, he pauses, glancing out the front door to see Summer bending over the passenger's side, coming up with what appeared to be the c.d. He grins, seeing her tentatively loading it onto her stereo, almost afraid that she might like it.  

_Breathe in for luck,  
breathe in so deep,  
this air is blessed,  
you share with me._

Deeming it bearable, the volume escalates as she drives off. 

_My hopes are so high,  
that your kiss might kill me.  
So won't you kill me,  
so I die happy._


End file.
